People have never been my strong-suit. I am awkward, quiet, and don't always know exactly what to say when it comes to having conversations with and reaching out to people. "Introvert" is practically my middle name (you can ask anyone who actually knows me, and they can confirm this for you haha). Getting attached to people is really scary for me a lot of times. There is always that fear of getting hurt. Of getting left behind. Of being betrayed.
There are always those "what-ifs?" that come into play with almost any situation we get ourselves into, whether it be relational, educational, physical, etc. "What if I don't get a good grade on this paper or exam?" "What if I push myself too hard in this activity?" There is hardly ever a clear, sure answer to anything. That's a part of life. Uncertainty is just something that we have to learn to accept and live with. And yeah, it's hard. So, so hard- especially when it comes to people and relationships.
Trusting people. Getting attached to people. Those two things require a LOT of faith. Seriously, they do. When you start talking to someone and developing a relationship with him/her, there is a mutual understanding between you and the other person that the relationship is going to continue to deepen as you get to know each other. I'm not just talking about dating relationships, I'm talking about friendships too. There is an aspect of trust in every single relationship- true relationships at least. If you feel you can't or don't want to trust someone you're friends with, you probably shouldn't even be in that relationship in the first place. God made us to be relational creatures, but it can be discouraging to pursue relationships only to lose them in the end. I honestly get it because I've been through the situation myself. Many times.
Forming new relationships are, in part, like taking a leap of faith and hoping that this thing, this friendship, that is developing will stay genuine and true. Trust is a huge, huge part of any lasting relationship. It is such a strong bond between two people, and without trust, there cannot be a true profoundness to any relationship. When God created people, He had in mind that they would be relational, both with Him and each other. Forming relationships is in our blood, and God commands us to love one another. But how can we love each other if we refuse to form any kind of relationship with the people around us?
In the end, it's all about having faith that God knows what He is doing in the lives of each and every one of us. When stepping into a new relationship is scary at times, God has a plan for us. He does. We may just not be able to see it right now. Even if that relationship ends up crashing and burning, we've got to keep going. Life goes on. People will come and go, but God is constant in our lives. He is eternal. And guess what? You WILL find those people in your life, your true friends, who will stick by your side through thick and thin for the rest of your life on this earth. God knows who they are, and they will show up just when you need them.
I found this quote that says, "God knows the when, the where, the why, and the how. So show up, do your part, and then let go and trust Him to do the rest."
Oh, and I found another quote that I really love (though it's kind of dark, haha. whoops) that says, "Sometimes, the reason for letting someone go is because they can't help but hurt you during this phase of their life. When you love someone deeply, you learn what demons live within them and you realize that they are hurting you because they are hurting somewhere within themselves. They are fighting a battle within and may not even know it, so they take it out on you and fight you. Decide to let them go, but not because you're being petty or resentful. You let them go because you really believe that the both of you can find the healing you truly need without being together and hurting each other in the process. Letting someone go doesn't mean you stop loving and caring about anyone. Letting go means you're choosing freedom over the illusion of loyalty."
Phew, that was a long quote, and if you read the entire thing, then I'm honestly really proud of you. Not that every single dying relationship or friendship looks like this- in fact, most probably don't. But, there is an aspect of the quote that I really love- letting go and moving on doesn't mean that you will not miss the person or stop loving him/her. Letting go means that you want to heal. It means that you've realized that you deserve differently. And yeah, healing is a long process, but it does happen, and someday, you are going to be ON TOP OF THE FREAKING WORLD. Was that super dramatic? It probably was, but hey! I really don't care. That's how I feel. Everything that happens in our lives happens for a reason. And in the end, God knows what He is doing and we have got to trust that things will end up the way they are meant to be- the right way in God's eyes.
So, yeah. If we used to be friends but no longer have a relationship, chances are, I miss you. Like, a lot. However, I also understand that God plans these things in our lives and that sometimes, people are meant to leave for a reason, even if we may not know what that reason is. I still love you, though, and I will probably always love you- even if loving you meant having to let you go.
There are always those "what-ifs?" that come into play with almost any situation we get ourselves into, whether it be relational, educational, physical, etc. "What if I don't get a good grade on this paper or exam?" "What if I push myself too hard in this activity?" There is hardly ever a clear, sure answer to anything. That's a part of life. Uncertainty is just something that we have to learn to accept and live with. And yeah, it's hard. So, so hard- especially when it comes to people and relationships.
Trusting people. Getting attached to people. Those two things require a LOT of faith. Seriously, they do. When you start talking to someone and developing a relationship with him/her, there is a mutual understanding between you and the other person that the relationship is going to continue to deepen as you get to know each other. I'm not just talking about dating relationships, I'm talking about friendships too. There is an aspect of trust in every single relationship- true relationships at least. If you feel you can't or don't want to trust someone you're friends with, you probably shouldn't even be in that relationship in the first place. God made us to be relational creatures, but it can be discouraging to pursue relationships only to lose them in the end. I honestly get it because I've been through the situation myself. Many times.
Forming new relationships are, in part, like taking a leap of faith and hoping that this thing, this friendship, that is developing will stay genuine and true. Trust is a huge, huge part of any lasting relationship. It is such a strong bond between two people, and without trust, there cannot be a true profoundness to any relationship. When God created people, He had in mind that they would be relational, both with Him and each other. Forming relationships is in our blood, and God commands us to love one another. But how can we love each other if we refuse to form any kind of relationship with the people around us?
In the end, it's all about having faith that God knows what He is doing in the lives of each and every one of us. When stepping into a new relationship is scary at times, God has a plan for us. He does. We may just not be able to see it right now. Even if that relationship ends up crashing and burning, we've got to keep going. Life goes on. People will come and go, but God is constant in our lives. He is eternal. And guess what? You WILL find those people in your life, your true friends, who will stick by your side through thick and thin for the rest of your life on this earth. God knows who they are, and they will show up just when you need them.
I found this quote that says, "God knows the when, the where, the why, and the how. So show up, do your part, and then let go and trust Him to do the rest."
Oh, and I found another quote that I really love (though it's kind of dark, haha. whoops) that says, "Sometimes, the reason for letting someone go is because they can't help but hurt you during this phase of their life. When you love someone deeply, you learn what demons live within them and you realize that they are hurting you because they are hurting somewhere within themselves. They are fighting a battle within and may not even know it, so they take it out on you and fight you. Decide to let them go, but not because you're being petty or resentful. You let them go because you really believe that the both of you can find the healing you truly need without being together and hurting each other in the process. Letting someone go doesn't mean you stop loving and caring about anyone. Letting go means you're choosing freedom over the illusion of loyalty."
Phew, that was a long quote, and if you read the entire thing, then I'm honestly really proud of you. Not that every single dying relationship or friendship looks like this- in fact, most probably don't. But, there is an aspect of the quote that I really love- letting go and moving on doesn't mean that you will not miss the person or stop loving him/her. Letting go means that you want to heal. It means that you've realized that you deserve differently. And yeah, healing is a long process, but it does happen, and someday, you are going to be ON TOP OF THE FREAKING WORLD. Was that super dramatic? It probably was, but hey! I really don't care. That's how I feel. Everything that happens in our lives happens for a reason. And in the end, God knows what He is doing and we have got to trust that things will end up the way they are meant to be- the right way in God's eyes.
So, yeah. If we used to be friends but no longer have a relationship, chances are, I miss you. Like, a lot. However, I also understand that God plans these things in our lives and that sometimes, people are meant to leave for a reason, even if we may not know what that reason is. I still love you, though, and I will probably always love you- even if loving you meant having to let you go.
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